It's a new day...

The Lord is so good to us. Each day He provides a chance for us to begin again, to start over and to renew our commitments to Him. We can choose to be obedient to His Commands, today.

Yesterday was a good day. We began the day with the 7:00 am Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Troubles seem to melt away during this time. Jesus' One & Only Sacrifice, right there for us, just as He was almost 2,000 years ago. Can't beat that!

Home-school begins at 9:30. The principle insisted we set a time and stick to it. We chose this time because I have time for shopping after Mass, if necessary...and then breakfast can be finished, as well. I have about 10 minutes to write before school begins.

Abortion has been on my mind a lot lately. What a horrifying act! A mother deciding that her precious baby is too inconvenient to allow to live. That tiny baby boy or girl is then dismembered without pain killers. Not only is Mommy saying, "You are only a thing to me-useless and troublesome...", She adds, "I choose to kill you in the most painful way possible."
Sick! Abortion has touched me in a profound way-My mother killed one of my elder siblings. I believe "it" was a "he". When I was a young girl, I fancied myself having an older brother, I called "David". (This was before I learned of my Mother's abortion. I found out a couple of years ago, in my mid-thirties.) In order to help my mother heal, I presented her with the idea of naming her baby. I asked her what she thought the baby was...she assumed it would have been a boy. I said, "Mom, your child exists. There is no "would have been". He IS. He deserves a name." She then said, "Well, we would have named him David."
Okay. Well, it seems my childish imagination was much more than pretend. Why wouldn't I know deep down that my family was not complete...that a loved one was missing? That a death had occurred? It seems I did.

After finding out that my mother had killed her own child, my eyes were finally opened to the pain we all experienced growing up with a senselessly cold and angry Mom. Her rages and fits were inexplicable to her children. We just thought she hated children, in general, and hated us, in particular. Our painful, lonely-for-a-loving-mother-childhood was a direct result of my mother's abortion. She has Post-Abortion Syndrome. Yes, yes, I realize those attached to sin, reject the obvious consequences to sin-but do you think that'll make me change my mind? I lived it. I know the dysfunction exists!

The catalyst to my mother's astounding announcement over breakfast one morning, was precipitated by a recent announcement of my eldest sister, days earlier. She came over and told my younger sister and I, that she killed her own child, whom she had conceived in an illicit affair with a married man. His own wife was sterile, so one might assume he'd be excited in a way...but, alas, he wasn't willing to leave his wife, so my niece or nephew had to die to punish him. This made my mother comfortable in airing her own announcement in this manner, "Well, I can't say much about it since I've done it myself."

Since my parents live with my family, I feel personally responsible for assisting my Mom to heal so that the contagion of sin doesn't spread any further. I refuse to allow this sin to live on affecting the generations. She has finally gone to Confession after 41 years of repressing this grave mortal sin. My children do not know of these sins, and I plan on keeping this private. They would be horrified to learn that Grandma not only "seems to not like kids very much", as they observed, but has killed her own child, nonetheless. Likewise, they would shudder at the thought of their favorite aunt (because she gushes over them) saying, "I want this baby out of me and dead. Make it extra painful, though."

My sister suffers from P.A.S as well, as evidenced by affair,divorce, failed relationships, alcoholism, Left the True Church, church hopping, gambling addiction, geographical moves to "escape", destructive financial decisions...health difficulties...anxiety and depression disorders...

Well, some say that is too harsh...too bad! That is the Truth and it IS ugly. My thought is that all the victims of Abortion-baby, parents, relatives,abortionist aka hired gun and co-horts need to be lifted up in prayer. We need to beg Almighty God to help us stop this scourge upon our lands and save these precious babies He has deemed worthy of being. We need to beg God for His Mercy in our failings to protect them.

This is a really fine way to work out one's feelings... I highly recommend journaling. But first-go to Confession. It is THE way to unburden.

Have a great day!
Catholictothecore